A friend recently asked me how to find ‘the right’ coach?
She’d been given a coach at work as part of a leadership development program. She knew coaching could benefit her, but she didn’t feel the coach she’d been allocated was quite the right fit.
I don’t believe there’s one perfect coach for every person.
I think there are coaches who are right for different seasons of our lives.
As we change, what we need from a coach often changes too.
I’ve been fortunate to work with many coaches over the course of my career and life. In fact, I became a coach because of the profound impact coaching had on me.
One person who has walked alongside me through many of those seasons is one of Australia’s early coaching pioneers, Belinda MacInnes MCC.
When I first worked with Belinda, she helped me navigate the breakdown of a relationship whilst also finding the courage to leave a corporate consulting career and start my own business.
Years later, she was there again as I found my voice in positive psychology and strengths-based practice, helping me become clearer about the kind of coach and facilitator I wanted to be.
More recently, she’s supported me through the transition of moving to a new city and building a new chapter of life.
Over the years Belinda has seen me single; married; becoming a stepmother to teens and then a mother of a baby; grieve people I love; and celebrate new beginnings. What has always struck me is not that she had all the answers, but that she somehow always asks the questions I needed for the season I am in.
Along the way, I’ve also deliberately sought out coaches with very specific expertise. Some have helped me build and market my business. Others have stretched my thinking about positive psychology and strengths-based practice. Others have helped me focus on my own health and wellbeing.
Looking back, I don’t think I was ever looking for A coach: I was looking for the right conversation for whatever life was asking of me at that time.
So if you’re thinking about finding a coach, perhaps spend less time asking, “Who’s the best coach?” and more time asking yourself:
- What challenges am I trying to navigate?
- What kind of conversation do I need right now?
- Do I need encouragement, challenge, perspective, accountability, or space to think?
- What kind of human do I want walking alongside me right now?
- Does this person "see" me?
For me, coaching has always been about the quality of the relationship.
The best coaching conversations are built on trust, curiosity, challenge and genuine care.
So rather than asking, “Who’s the best coach for me?” perhaps the better question is: “What kind of conversations do I need in this season of my life?”